A Winter of Therapy, Awareness, and Small Victories

 

A Winter of Therapy, Awareness, and Small Victories

It’s been a little quiet here — even though this page was meant to be active. A space for our peers, for those directly affected, and for anyone who wants to learn more about the journeys of others and the courage it takes to face them.

In the second half of 2025, Tobias made progress that brought us joy — but that progress also revealed some lingering challenges more clearly.

Let me explain it this way: imagine your neck hurts, your back makes daily life harder. Then the physiotherapist gets to work, and you begin learning how to strengthen your core muscles. Suddenly, things start improving. Your posture, your stability, your pain levels — all better. Then, out of nowhere, the tennis elbow flares up again. You start to feel it. Why now?

It’s a matter of perception.
The neck pain had been louder — more dominant. The brain gave it priority. Now that you're addressing the neck and responding to the body's signals, the brain shifts focus and says, “Okay, this part’s doing better — but don’t forget about the elbow.” Pain is a signal, a form of protection.

For Tobias — and for many people with neurological conditions — it works in much the same way.

As I release tension from my own body, I notice how the brain responds. It relaxes, and then it reveals the next layer that needs care.

Short-term memory is still one of Tobias’s biggest challenges. One coping mechanism he developed is repetition — repeating phrases, words, or patterns. They come out quickly and often, in conversation or text. If I ask him, “What did we do this morning?”, he often answers right away: “I don’t know.” And most of the time, that’s accurate. But if I rephrase the question slightly, he often begins to remember specific moments.

So you see — saying “I don’t know” is easier than trying to explain something. This issue stems from damage in the frontal lobe. But the brain is capable of adapting and learning strategies — and it’s our job to help Tobias discover, understand, and apply those strategies.

I’ll be honest: this phase is tough. It’s exhausting. It pushes me to the edge.
Can I give up? No. I don’t want that to be an option.
As a mother, you somehow develop a kind of superpower. And every day, I ask the universe for guidance and strength.

My prayers have changed. They’re no longer a list of requests — just a simple “thank you” and a quiet ask for strength and inspiration. For open doors, for new people to enter Tobias’s life with kindness and friendship. For strength and clarity for all the therapists and friends who’ve been walking this road with us for years.

Living like this gives you humility. It teaches you deep empathy for others — but it also sharpens your sense of who and what is worth your energy. You begin to feel what truly matters. You learn where your energy is needed — and where it’s drained.

I used to believe in full inclusion. And I still do — it’s a noble and healthy principle. But I’ve also learned that practicing exclusivity — in who you spend time with, where you put your energy, and what you engage in — doesn’t make you a bad person. It makes you mindful.
It helps preserve your strength — so your immediate environment becomes something that gives energy back to you.

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Since the first week of January, Tobias and I have been staying in a small town in North Rhine-Westphalia. He’s receiving intensive speech therapy here — around six or seven sessions a day, for five weeks straight. It’s an incredible opportunity.

We’re hopeful that these new impulses will help his brain learn new tricks — new strategies toward independence.

The snow makes everything look peaceful and soft. It feels like rest, even though this isn’t really a break. I manage to write and share our journey while Tobias is in therapy. Then I pick him up, wheel him to his next session — and keep writing.

So, wherever you are reading this — we’re sending you warmth, light, and healing energy in every part of your life.

With love,
The Dunns (Katja, Tyler & Tobias)