Day 91 (Nov 21)
Katja and I spent a quiet day with Tobias. It was an average day for him. He spoke a few words, but remained mainly silent. His range of motion wasn't as good as it has been, but he was able to move his arm. His heart rate was surprisingly high at just under 100, but he confirmed verbally that he was comfortable so I'm not sure why his heart was beating faster than normal.
Friends of mine dropped by the hospital to check in on us in the late afternoon and we had a good chat catching up with them. It’s good to see people and step outside of our normal hospital and care giver routines. We appreciate the thoughtful words and acts of kindness that so many people have provided for us. There is unfortunately no evident higher purpose being served through Tobias’ misfortune. I trust that in the end, everything will be okay and we'll be stronger in some ways, but right now it's still bleak and I don't see how the sum of Tobias' brain bleed experiences will end with a positive balance. However, it is also clear to me that the grace and humanity that have been entrusted to us by family, friends and strangers helped preserve us as we were thrown about in this emotional tempest and it prompts us to share our compassion with others as we see them navigate their own personal storms. No one walks in the sun all the time and we can travel farther and in more safety when we go together.
Hope over fear.
I am so sorry for the heavy weight you and Katja are carrying. It is hard to imagine the emotions you are feeling as you anticipate this next chapter in Tobias' journey. We are so appreciative for the time you take each day to provide the updates. We read every word. We are praying for your family. Big hug and safe travels to Katja!
ReplyDeleteI am continuing to pray for Tobias, for his strength and recovery, as well as for you and Katja. I appreciate the updates you share, and I send so much love across the miles. Safe travels for Katja back to Germany🙏❤
ReplyDelete